Going
through life, each of us forms our own unique relationship with pain. Whether
it is physical, emotional or mental pain, it is rare to hear of someone who has
never been hurt. Nor would I trust such a person. Pain tells us we are out of
our comfort zone, it signals that something is happening beyond our expected
norm. When considering our day to day lives, we often feel discomfort when our
expectations aren’t met. These expectations could be long standing paradigms
that we believe in and have had challenged, or they could be expectations made
from recently acquired information. Generally, when things don’t go according
to plan, we feel a little tightness in our chest, some discomfort, some pain.
This may vary greatly from person to person. Some people don’t deal with pain
very well, others were born from it.
While pain
is a very unique feeling, however, societies tend to under harness the
potential power of this feeling and instead teach that pain is something to be
avoided. I would argue the contrary. Pain is unique and powerful emotion to an
individual in the context of his or her life, which instead of being completely
steered away from, should be recognize and accepted for what it is. Pain is our
emotional response to a stimulus. When thinking about pain or discomfort in
this manner, it can actually be used as our own compass to explore our
boundaries. Where do our limits lie?
It can be
used as a diagnostic tool for not only ourselves but the journeys and projects
we embark on throughout life. Okay so this company project doesn’t seem to be
doing well, why is that? Why am I suddenly feeling this way when this person
brings up ”blank”? Something is happening, it’s not going as I expected and I’m
having an emotional reaction. Now that I am aware of my actual boundaries, and where
my limits are, where do I go from here? What changes do I need to make to
better handle this situation in the future?
Of course
actually deploying this style of self-awareness during the live feeling of pain
is no simple task, it takes a conscious degree of mindfulness. So practice is
key, as practice makes perfect. Actually practice doesn't make perfect, it
makes it habits, and habits take very little energy to do. So the more we
practice being mindful in life, the sooner we can discover our own limitations,
where they come from, if they can be pushed, without even thinking about it.
As an entrepreneur, it is imperative that we
realise when we are out of our depth, and that when we are, we decide that staying
the course is what we need to do or to alter it. It’s when we ignore what our
bodies are telling us that we begin to suffer. It’s when we continue to act incongruently
to who we actually are, that we continue to suffer. So don’t ignore the pain, embrace
it, listen to it, accept it, and make the needed changes for you to grown in
all areas of your life.
There is a very important lesson that I must follow up with and that is,
We are not our thoughts or our feelings.
When we identify with a thought or an emotion, especially a negative one, we run the risk of becoming consumed in a world of hurt. In addition, all emotions stem from thoughts. Every feeling you've felt, was sourced from a thought. By policing our thoughts we can become better masters of our house. Awareness is the answer, by observing your thoughts and feelings instead of letting them run your life, we begin to separate the feelings and thoughts based on assumptions from our true selves. Most of our negative thoughts and emotions stem from not knowing. If you don't know, ask, do not base your actions, risk your mental health, or happiness on uninformed assumptions. If you're afraid to ask, maybe that is your pain compass signalling you have some work to do.
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